Change Your Money Mindset to Change Your Life
Why silence about money hurts our wellbeing (and how to fix it), plus four must-read books to change your life.
*They don’t teach you this in school.*
We’re not taught about money in America.
In elementary school, maybe we learn how to count coins. In middle school, we have a lesson or two on the economy. In college, well, if you don’t study business… you don’t learn about money.
Maybe the lucky ones have parents who taught them about money—but those are the lucky ones.
Money isn’t just not talked about. It’s frowned upon to talk about. When was the last time you and your friends discussed your savings accounts? Or your credit card debt? Even if you did, it probably wasn’t a soft and cushy conversation. Maybe it was a little uncomfortable.
Why is it that money is such a major part of our lives but such a minor part of our conversations?
As kids, we’re taught that talking about money is impolite or awkward. 🙊
Money can be uncomfortable because it’s personal. It’s deeply tied to our identity, our relationships, our feelings of self-worth, and our feelings of security.
We fear money because we like to maintain an illusion of control.
If we don’t talk about money, we can pretend it doesn’t exist.
Like the annoying daughter that I am, I entered my dad’s woodshop a week ago and asked him what he thinks of when he thinks of money.
“Indifference,” he replied with a shrug. Hmm.
I pondered the answer and decided to ask my mom the same question.
Quickly, she replied, “Oh, I don’t really have any feelings about money. I’m very neutral about it.” Interesting.
Do you sense a theme here? My parents, like so many people, like to pretend that money doesn’t matter. They have no feelings about money, they say! Really??
We all have feelings about money.
With all that said, why should we normalize discussing money?
Our financials have a large impact on our lives. Put plainly: money buys us food. We need to eat to live.
When something is talked about freely, it is better understood. Then, when we understand it, we can't start to take control over it in our own lives. Our financial health is an oft-underestimated aspect of our overall wellness. It’s time we give it the attention it deserves!
And lastly, how can we normalize money talk?
Have transparent conversations about it.
Make a habit of discussing money in a judgment-free way with your family or friends. It will be awkward at first (but at least now you know why). Can we normalize asking our friends how much is in their savings account?
Invest in your financial education. 📚
I felt way more comfortable talking about money when I began to actually understand it. That said, you don’t have to be an expert to start asking questions!
I’ll leave you with 4 books that changed my life and the way I view money.
1. Rich AF
How can we play the money game if we don’t even know the rules?
Vivian Tu gives you the entire playbook in an honest, candid, easy-to-understand way.
“You can only save as much as you earn…but you can always earn more”
Like Ramit (below), she knows the avocado toast and latte aren’t the problem. A focus on earning more—rather than endlessly cutting spending—follows an abundance mindset and is the backbone of this book.
2. I Will Teach You to Be Rich
This is the OG for me—the first “finance” book I ever read.
I love a lot of things about this book, but mostly because it’s so practical. The book covers everything you need to know about money, starting from the beginning. From savings accounts to credit cards to negotiating a raise, Ramit has you covered. If you like step-by-step instructions, this one’s for you.
Ramit also operates from an abundance mindset and advocates for living “your rich life.” It’s a concept that was so freeing for me and changed the way I viewed spending.
3. Rich Dad, Poor Dad
This one is a classic that I read recently because I seen lots of people recommending it. It only took me a few hours to buzz through.
Robert Kiyosaki tells a story about growing up with two influential people (his dad and his friend’s dad) who had different views on money.
“The poor and the middle class work for money. The rich have money work for them.”
4. The Psychology of Money
Housel’s chapters are bite-size nuggets of insight.
When it comes to money, he’s got his head screwed on straight. One point Housel makes that I really appreciate is the power of compounding and why it is always underestimated.
If you take anything away from this book, it’s that compounding, diversification, and patience are the keys to investment success.
This week, I encourage you to talk about money. Start small—ask questions, share knowledge, and break the taboo.
As always, thanks for reading.
💗,
Sophie Francis